Author : MAMAN MAAMA Category : African Stories & Novels
auren Jidda, darajar taku ce ta rufe min ido har na kasa bincike mai kyau a kansa kamar yadda ya dace. Wannan shine kuskure na. Wannan shine abinda nake so in gyara. Ba zan hana Jidda komawa gidan mijinta ba indai har hakan shine abinda take so kamar yadda ba zan tursasa mata ta koma ba in hakan shine abinda bata so. Gatanan ga ku. Idan zata koma yanzu ma zata iya dauko kayanta ku tafi. Amma idan tace bata so ina son kuma kuyi respecting din decision dinta ku barta"
Na yi shiru kaina a sunkuye duk ina jin maganganun su. Baffa Halilu ya kira sunana na amsa ba tare da na dago kai na kalle shi ba sai yayi min straight tambaya "kina son Umar kina kuma son ki koma gidan sa?"
Na dago kai na kalli Umar wanda yake opposite dina, zuciya ta ta buga saboda tsoron da yanayin sa ya bani. Ya koma kamar skeleton mai fata. Farar Fatarsa tay duhu sosai lips dinsa duk sun bushe, kayan jikinsa a hargitse.
Na mayar da kaina kasa sannan a hankali nace "ina son Umar Baffa. Amma kuyi hakuri. Allah shine shaidata bana son cigaba da auren sa, aurensa ya fita daga raina gabaki daya"
Duk gurin yayi shiru. Sai Mama ta sauko kusa da ni ta dafa ni "Jidda. Ki duba darajar yayan da suke tsakanin ku. Dan Allah kiyi hakuri ki koma gidan mijinki. Kiyi hakuri da duk abinda yayi miki da wanda ni nayi miki ki yafe mana ki....."
Na dago kai ina kallon ta nace "na yafe masa Mama, na yafe miki ke ma. Amma aurensa na gama"
Zata sake magana sai Baba ya sauko ya kama ta ya mayar da ita kan kujera, ina jin sheshshekar kukan ta daga baya but for the first time in my life naji babu hawaye a nawa idon. My mind was already set. Na san abinda nake so and I am standing by it.
Naji Baffa yace "to Umar kaji. Cikin mu kuma babu wanda zai matsa mata. Decision dinta ne kuma ta riga ta yanke"
Sai naji Umar yayi maganar sa ta farko tunda yazo gurin.
"Babu komai Baffa, na gode da dukkan kulawa"
Sai ya mike ya fita waje. Duk mutanen gurin suka bi shi da kallo. I thought ya bar unguwar ne ma. Sai kuma gashi ya sake dawowa falon ya zo gabana ya durkusa, ban dago ido na na kalle shi ba sai ya mika min wata farar takarda sannan yace "gashi. Thank you for everything".
Na saka hannu na a hankali na karbi kar karamar takardar da tafi kama da wadda aka yago daga jikin jotter. Sannan cikin dabara yadda babu wanda zai gani na zira hannu na cikin nasa sannan naja tsohon band dina da har yau yake makale a hannunsa. Ya tsinke ya tarwatse akan cinyata, sannan without looking at his eyes na karbi takardar nace "nima na gode".
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*wannan littafin na siyarwa ne bisa amana idan baki siya ba kar ki karanta idan kuma kin siya kar ki sharing in kika yi kin ci amana kuma ke da Allah*
*The Next Page*
*Rayuwa feji feji ce, kamar pages na littafi, kowanne page idan ka bude yana da farko kuma yana da karshe, in ka gama wannan fejin kuma ba zaka san menene a cikin next page ba har sai ka bude shi tukunna*
*We all have the right to open the next page in the book of life, what most of us lack is the courage*
Umar
Wadannan kwanakin, wadannan unfortunate kwanakin are the worst days of his life. Gabakidaya duniya ta juya masa baya. Ba zai iya tuna ranar da ya zauna yaci abinci a tsanake ba, ko ya saka abincin ma a bakinsa baya iya wucewa ta makwogwaron sa saboda wani abu mai daci daya tokare masa a makogwaron, ba zai kuma iya tuna ranar da ya kwanta yayi bacci for five hours straight ba. Some nights yana yin su ne a zaune akan gadonsa hannun sa dafe da goshin sa idonsaa kafe a guri daya duk da ba wai kallon abinda yake gurin yake ba.
Babu abinda yake yawo a kwakwalwar sa irin daci da takaicin irin mummunar rayuwarsa. Babu abinda yake yawo a zuciyarsa irin tsantsar nadama da kyamar irin abubuwan da ya aikata a baya.
Ba zai iya nuna abu guda daya da ya karu da shi a bariki ba, amma a yanxu zai iya nuna abubuwa fiye da lissafin sa wadanda ya rasa a sanadiyyar bariki. Bayan his relationship with God, babban abinda yafi damunsa a cikin abubuwan da ya rasa shine iyayensa. They have been the light of his life tun sanda ya bude idon sa ya ganshi a duniya amma yanzu ba zai iya daga ido ya kalle su ba, ba zai iya zama a kusa da su ba, ba zai iya yi musu magana ba, ya tabbatar da ace ana musanyan ɗa to da tabbas zasu chanja shi suyi disowning dinsa, gwara ma su bada shi a basu shinkafa yar hausa, ko babu komai sa dafa su ci su kuma bayar sadaka su samu lada, shi kuwa fa? Menene zasu iya nunawa nashi wanda ya amfane su da shi? In banda takaici da bakin ciki da tozarci da ...da ....da ....da?
Musamman Mama. Anya kuwa akwai uwar da ta taba nuna wa danta soyayya kamar yadda Mama ta nuna masa? Anya kuwa akwai uwar da danta ya taba nuna mata mugun gani kamar wanda ya nuna mata?
Duk sanda ya tuno last time da ya hada ido da mamansa sai yaji kamar ya makala igiya a jikin fanka ya rataye kansa. Yo in ma ya zauna a duniyar menene amfanin sa? In kuma ya mutum wanene zaiyi kewar sa? Iyayensa kam ya san mutuwar sa will be a good riddance to them, matarsa ma haka, watakila yayansa zasu yi kewarsa a yanzu tunda basu da hankali basu san ko waye shi ba amma ya tabbatar idan suka girma suka ji irin halinsa da abubuwan kunyar daya aikata zadu gode Allah daya mutu da wuri. Musamman Yasmin. Idan Yasmin ta fahimci abinda ya faru da ita kuma ta san halinsa tabbas zata jingina abinda ya faru da itan da cewa laifin sa ne, and she will never forgive him kamar yadda her life will never be the same again.
Ya runtse idonsa hawaye masu zafi suka zubo kan kuncinsa. He had a good life, good parents, excellent wife, excellent everything, amma ya tattara a zuba ruwa a kansu ya watsar a rariya. And now he is paying for his sins na duniya kadai. Na lahira kuma yana can yana jiransa. All for a few minutes pleasure. Forbidden pleasures.
Ya juya kansa yana kallon wayar sa da take kara a gefensa, through the blurry vision na idonsa ya karanta sunan Baffa Halilu. Waliyyin sa. Ya matsa fatar idon hawayen cikin su ya zubo, vision dinsa ya zama clear ya dauki wayar yana jin zuciyarsa tana gitsitstsirewa a kirjin sa, ya san kwanan zancen, last thing da ya rage masa najin dadi a rayuwarsa za'a karba. Aurensa.
Sai da kiran ya kusa katsewa sannan ya dauka ya saka a kunnensa ya danyi gyaran murya sannan yayi sallama. Ba tare da baffan ya amsa sallamar sa ba yace "Faruq ka zo ina neman ka. Yanzu" bai jira ya amsa ba kuma ya katse kiran.
Umar ya ajiye wayar sannan ya sake jingina kansa a jikin bangon dayake bayansa "innalillahi wa inna ilaihir rajiun" na ambata a hankali. "Ya Allah!" Sai kuma ya kasa addu'ar, to mai zai ce? Shi kam yana da bakin yiwa Ubangijin sa magana ne? Ya tuno da maganar Jidda ranar dazata bar gidan sa.
"Wanne Allahn kake rantsewa dashi? Allahn da kake sabawa a duk lokacin daka samu dama?"
Sai yaji wata irin kunya ta rufe shi, kunyar Ubangijin sa, ya tono da munanan abubuwan da ya yi ta aikatawa ya kuma tuna da cewa duk lokacin da yake aikatawar ubangiji yana kallon sa. Ya tuno da maganar Jidda
"Ka manta cewa akwai ranar da za'a saka maka rayuwar ka a gaban kowa kamar a TV kowa ya gani?"
Ya tuna cewa Mama ta riga ta ga wani bangare na cikin rayuwar ta sa and ganin da tayi masa is the worst thing that has ever happened to him. To Ubangijin sa fa da yake gani kullum? Da yasan komai?
Ya dafa bango ya mike tsaye tare da dafe kirjinsa ɓangaren hagu da hannunsa na dama. Ya rufe idonsa yana jin yadda zuciyarsa take yi kamar zata fito daga ma'ajiyar ta. Sai da ta lafa masa sannan ya mike straight ya fara neman key din motarsa, bai taba tunanin Jidda zata yi irin wannan taurin kan akan wannan maganar ba, they have been through worst cases than wannan na karshen kuma duk tayi hakuri soyayyar da take masa tayi prevailing amma wannan ta rikide ta koma wata halitta ta daban ba jiddan da ya sani ba and the last time he saw her, the last time they talked, ranar da ya aikata abin da ya aikata har Mama ta ganshi, a ranar ya gani a idon Jidda cewa da gaske take maganar da take fada. She is done with him.
Sai dai baiji haushinta ba. Tabbas tayi masa kokarin da baya jin zai samu matar da zata yi masa irin sa, tayiasa soyayyar da baya jin zai samu wadda zata yi masa irin ta, tabbas yayi asarar da ba zai taba mayarwa ba. And that's what hurt him the most a cikin maganar su.
Direct gidan baffansa ya nufa not minding kayan da suke jikin sa da kuma the fact that jikinsa bai ga ruwa da sunan wanka ba ballantana turare, ya riga ya san maganar da zai tarar a can din, ya san Abba ne ya kira baffan ya gaya masa halin da ake ciki kuma ya nemi ya karbar masa takardar Jidda a hannunsa.
"Not now, not ever"
Ya fada a fili lokacin da yake packing a kofar gidan sannan ya shiga ciki. Abinda yayi tsammani shi ya tarar kuwa. And he did abinda yayi wa kansa alkawarin zaiyi. He accepted dukkan laifuffukan da aka lissafo masa.
Ai kuwa yaga tashin hankali a gurin baffan na sa, at one point ya dauka ma dukan sa zaiyi kuma ya tabbatar abinda ya hana shi dukan sa kawai saboda jikinsa ya manyanta in ya dake shi shima sai yaji jiki, amma shi umar din yaso ace ya dake shin ko kadan ne ko ya samu ya danji sanyi a ransa,sai dai kuma yaji dadin fadan da yayi masa kamar wuta. Ya tuna sanda yake neman mai yi masa fada, lokacin da ya fara shiga harkar, lokacin da da an yi masa fada irin wanda aka yi masa yau an kuma saka ido a kansa an daidaita lamarin sa tabbas da ba'a zo inda ake a yanzu ba.
Zafin fadan da baffan yayi masa har sai da Umar ya dauka zai sallama shi ne yace masa babu shi babu shi har abada, amma sai yaga bai yi haka ba instead sai ya saka ya dauke shi a motarsa suka tafi gidan su, gidan da tun ranar da suka yi ido biyu da Mama a gidan gona bai sake taka kafarsa zuwa cikin sa ba.
Yanzun ma sai yaki shiga gidan, ya zauna a cikin mota yana kallon kofar shiga cikin gidan yana tuno rayuwar sa a gidan da irin soyayyar da take tsakanin sa da iyayensa da sisters dinsa. Sisters dinsa da ya tuna sai ya tuno masa da Mufida, da kuma mummunan ganin da yayi mata ita da babban abokin sa kuma babban amininsa a bariki Bashir.
Ya runtse idonsa yana jin zafi a ransa, zafin irin cin amanar da Bashir yayi masa da irin wulakanta shi da yayi. Allah kadai yasan dadewar da yayi mana lalata da sister dinsa. Ya tuno maganar Jidda.
"Ya zaka ji idan ka ganni da wani akan gado? Ya zaka ji idan aka yiwa Mufida abinda kake yiwa kannen wasu? Ya zaka ji idan wani ya lalata Yasmin?"
Ya girgiza kansa. Kusan duk abinda ta fadaya faru. Na tan ne kawai bai faru ba. Ya jingina kansada jikin kujera
"God please no. Ubangiji ka tsayar da masifar nan haka ya Rabbi"
Ya rufe idonsa yana jin salon bugun zuciyarsa yana chanjawa, imagining yake yi na abinda Jidda ta fada, idan ya ganta akan gado in the act tare da wani ya zai ji? Tabbas za'a dauki gawarsa a gurin. But she is innocent, ta yaya haka zata same ta? Ya tuna na shekarun da ta dauka tana social media wanda shi da kansa ya bude mata kuma ya cigaba fa bibiyar ta dan yana da password dinta na komai kuma yana budewa a wayarsa ba tare da sanin ta ba saboda insecurity dinsa, yana duba duk abubuwan da take yi amma ko sau daya bai taba kama ta da abu makamancin haka ba, ya kan ga maza yan iskan facebook suna yi mata magana sometimes, amma ko sau daya bata reply, shine ma yake zazzagin su daga farko,daga baya ma sai ya chanja mata setting yadda babu wanda zai iya yi mata message sai wanda yake friend dinta ita kuma bata taba karbar friend request sai daga wanda ta sani dan haka he trust her with his whole heart.
Amma kuma ai Yasmin ma is very much innocent, even more innocent than her mother, amma ga abinda ya faru da ita. Dan haka tabbas Jidda bata tsira ba. Ya sake girgiza kansa da sauri "ya Allah!" Bakin cikin sa shine yasan duk wadannan abubuwan are bound to happen amma ya take yayi kamar bai sani ba sai yanzu kuma yake nadama, nadamar da yake ganin ta kamar marar amfani a duniya...
Ya zaiyi ya ceci Jidda daga biyan bashin da bata dauka ba?
Can kasan zuciyarsa yaji wata murya ta gaya masa
"ka sake ta"
Ya girgiza kansa da sauri
"Not now, not ever"
Kamar daga sama yaji muryar yaya Mubaraka. "Umar me kake yi anan? Kai kadai kana magana kamar wani tababbe?" Ya juya yana kallon ta, sai yaga yanayin fuskarta ya chanja zuwa tsoro.
"Subhanallah! Umar kaga yadda ka koma kuwa? Are You okay? Shaye shaye ka fara ko me? Mun shiga uku"
Ya dan kalli kansa briefly a jikin mirror, ya manta rabon da ya kallo fuskarsa, shima sai da ya dan ja baya kadan da yaga reflection din nasa, babban abinda ya tsorata shi in aka dauke kasumbar da ta cika masa fuska ita ce yadda idonsa ya fadaya koma ciki sannan ya jure daga farare zuwa wata color mai fatsi fatsi, lips dinsa sun bushe sunyi cracking, ya zaro harshe ya lashi lips din da sauri trying to bring back their color amma sai suka koma dabbare dabbare, ya dan kirkiri murmushi
"Yaya, kin shigo gidan? Ya yaran?"
Ta tsaya tana kallon sa bata amsa ba, sai ya dauke kan sa gefe ya daina kallon cikin idonta. Maybe ta sani itama, maybe Mama ta bata labari.
Sai ta girgiza kanta cikin takaici sannan tace "zamuyi magana. No da kai Umar. Duk da dai ba jin magana takake yi ba amma ba zan fasa ba dan abin naka kullum cigaba yake yi. Mama tana kwance babu lafiya amma ko duba ta baka taba zuwa kayi ba duk da kana cikin asibitin kaima, har aka sallame ta, yanzu a gida ma baka taba shiga ka ganta ba ko waya ka gagara ka kira kace ya jikin ta. Uwar daga durkusa ta haifeka. Umar da ta ke sonka fiye da kowa da komai. Ka kyauta. In an kira ka ma ba zaka dauka ba. Ni dai dole in gaya maka gaskiya tun kafin duniya ta gaya maka" ta wuce shi da sauri cikin fishi. Ya lumshe ido a hankali yace "na nawa kuma? Already na gama daukan darasin duniyar ai"
Sai kuma ya bude kofar da sauri yabi bayan ta yace "Yaya! Ya jikin Maman?" Ta juyo ta watsa masa harara tace "ba'a sani ba" sannan ta wuce cikin gida.
Ya bi bayanta da kallo a ransa yana so ya shiga shima ya ga jikin mahaifiyar ta sa, ko daga nesa ne ya ganta koda ita bata ganshi ba, ko da basu hada ido ba amma sai ya kasa.
Yana tsaye a gurin har Baffa Halilu ya fito daga palon Baba. Da sauri ya bi bayansa ya bude masa kofar mota ya shiga sannan shima ya shiga seat din driver yana kunna motar yana jiran yaji baffan ya fara magana amma sai yaji yayi shiru, har suka koma gidan sa bai yi masa wata magana ba sai da yayi packing sannan yace "dattin ka yayi yawa Umar, ya wuce duk inda nake tunanin ya kai. Zan nemi surukan ka muyi kokarin gyara maganar aurenka sannan zamuyi kokarin ganin mun gyara ka kaima da taimakon ubangiji, amma ka sani, babu wanda zai iya gyara maka rayuwarka sai Ubangijin da ya halicce ka, Ubangijin da ka sabawa, gurinsa zaka je ka tuba ka nemi yafiyar sa idan ya so ka da rahama sai ya bude ka, ya bude mu baki daya, dan tabbas abinda ka dauka tamkar kashin kaji ne wanda ka shafawa kanka ka kuma shafawa danginka da da duk wanda ya rabe ka"
Wannan ce maganar da ta tsayawa Umar a ransa har washegari, tabbas bashi da ja akan cewa kashin kaji ne ya debo yake shafawa duk wanda yake close to him, close to his heart. Ya tuno Jidda, the farther away she is from him the safer for her, a tunaninsa.
Amma baya jin zai iya rabuwa da ita.
Not now. Not ever.
Sai ya mayar da hankalinsa kan maganar Baffa ta farko, maganar neman tuba a gurin ubangiji wadda dama abinda yake yi kenan a cikin kwanakin nan yanzu sai ya kara akai, in ya tsaya a tsaye da dare baya zama har sai yaji kafafuwansa sun kumbura, in ya
