Author : MAMAN MAAMA Category : African Stories & Novels
kuma kasance wanda yafi kowa hurting dinka. Am done. But still ya kamata inji his side of the story right? Albarkacin yayan mu ya kamata in bashi damar yi min bayani right? Albarkacin soyayya, soyayya da nake masa, soyayya da yake min.
"Asabe?" Na furta a tsakiyar kuka, "me ya faru tsakanin ka da Asabe?"
Irin yadda jini ya dauke daga farar fuskarsa ta koma kamar takarda, da yadda idonsa ya tsaya tsak a kaina shock a rubuce a duk angle na fuskarsa ya saka na gama fahimtar amsarsa. It did happen. Na rufe bakina da hannuna, kukan ma ya tsaya. Muka tsaya chirko chirko muna kallon juna lallai ta bahaushe da yace wargi ma guri shikai.
Ina kallon sa yana kokarin harhada kalamansa sannan ya tattaro duk wani bravo da yake ganin yana da shi yace "nothing happened" but I know he is lying, yanayin fuskarsa kadai ya tabbatar min da cewa he is lying. Shi abinda bai sani ba shine sam sam bai iya karya ba, duk sanda yayi min karya sai na gane saboda sam bai iya pretending ba, ko da zaiyi karyar da baki amma abinda fuskarsa zata nuna daban. And right now, he is lying.
Na juya da sauri na daina kallon sa dan zuciyata ba zata iya cigaba da kallon sa ba, in kuwa na cigaba to tabbas abinda nake gudu zai faru, zan fadi in mutu da bakin cikin sa. Da sauri na karasa gaban wardrobe dina na bude na fara watso kayana zuwa kan gado na. Ya taho yana kokarin rufewa, na juyo a fusace "ka matsa ka bani guri tun kafin inyi maka rauni" ya kama hannuna yana dukan fuskarsa dashi "hit me, hit me all you want but listen to me. Nothing happened. Na rantse miki da Allah nothing happened. Babu abinda ya faru karya take yi"
Na kwace hannuna tare da goge su a jikin zani na kamar wadda aka shafa wa datti, nace "nothing happened? Kamar yadda nothing happened a tsakanin ka da Mammy, tsakanin ka da Maryam, tsakanin ka da Zahra ko kuma kamar yadda nothing happened tsakanin ka da zuwaira? Ko tsakanin ka da sauran wadanda na manta da sunansu ko kuma tsakanin ka da wadanda ban ma sani ba? Wanne daga cikin nothing happened din kake so in dauka?" Na fada cikin karajin da na tabbatar mai gadi ma ya jiyo.
Yayi kokarin toshe min baki yana zaro ido cike da tsoro, idanunsa kamar zasu fado, nasan tsoron me yake ji, nasan babban abinda yafi tsoro sama da komai shine kar yayansa suji, kar yayansa su gani. "Shshsh" yace yana doya yatsansa akan lebensa "the kids! Kiyi magana a hankali" nayi murmushin takaici ina girgiza kaina. "The kids" na maimaita. "Your kids. Shin ko ka manta ni ma yar wani ce? Ko ka manta Wadannan matan da na lissafa maka duk yayan wasu ne? Ko ka manta yarinyar can Asabe yar wani ce ita ma?"
Ya sake kokarin toshe min baki yana kallon kofa sannan ya kalli taga hankalinsa a matukar tashe, yana girgiza kansa. "I didn't. Na gaya miki karya take yi. Haba Jidda, believe me, Asabe fa muke magana akai, wannan kazamar yarinyar, this is so insulting to even think about haba Jidda. Na rantse miki, wallahi, na rantse da Allah......." Na ture hannunsa daga bakina na koma gaban wardrobe na cigaba da watso kayana zuwa kan gado "ka rantse kace, as if rantsuwar ka is worth anything to me. Ka rantse da Allah kace, Allahn da kake sabawa at the slightest chance da ka samu? Ta yaya kake tunanin rantsuwar da zaka yi min dashi zata ba da wata ma'ana a gurina"
Ya biyo ni ya rike hannuna da hannu daya yana rufe kofar wardrobe din da daya hannun. "Jidda! Ya fada yana girgiza ni kamar mai kokarin dawo dani hayyacina. "Think with your head, not your heart please. Asabe fa kike zargina da ita" na tsaya ina kallon sa cikin ido, ina kallon yadda yake struggling with his inner self yana son yayi maintening innocent look dinsa. A hankali kuma a nutse nace
"ba Asabe ba umarul faruq, ko akuya ce aka daura mata zani aka kuma shafa mata jan baki to in ka ganta sai ka bita ballantana mace, yarinya karama mai jini a jika kamar Asabe"
Ya sake ni a hankali, ina lura da yadda kamannin fuskarsa suka juya daga innocent zuwa bacin rai, tabbas magana ta ta bata masa rai ni kuma hakan ya faranta min, and I am looking forward to fada masa wadansu masu zafin da zasu cigaba da bata masa rai kamar haka. Yayi taku biyu baya yana kallona sannan ya juya da sauri ya fita daga dakin.
Akwati na na cika da kayana, sannan na dauko babbar jaka na fara zuba kayan yayana a ciki, ina yi ina magana ni kadai kamar tababbiya, "na gama, na gama aurenka Faruq. Ko da duniyar nan zasu taru a kaina ba zan dawo gidan ka ba. Kuma ba zan bar maka yayana ba ko da kuwa bara zanyi in ciyar dasu" babu ko ninki haka nake watsa kayan a cikin jakar.
Kofa naji an turo da karfi an shigo still ba tare da sallama ba, na dago da niyyar in sauke masa kwandon bala'i sai naga Yasmin tana kallo na fuskar ta cike da tsoro. "Mommy yanzu naga Daddy ya shiga dakin Asabe da belt a hannunsa, dukanta zai yi?" Na yar da kayan da suke hannuna ina kallon yarinyar da take tsaye gaba na.
Umar bai taba daga hannunsa ya dake ni ba ballantana yayan mu, ni ko tsawa ma zance ban taba jin yayi mana ba. Ihun Asabe ne ya saka na kalli kofa da sauri "wayyo mommy ki taimake ni" ban jira komai ba na fita da sauri, na shiga uku, kar ya kashe yar mutane, wannan cin zali har ina? Ga mari ga kuma tsinka jaka?
Ai kuwa abinda na tarar kenan. Ya rike ta da hannu daya dayan hannun kuma yana lafta mata belt din hannunsa. Na rike hannun duk da nasan ba wai karfina ne ya rike shi ba, ya tsaya ne kawai saboda gani na, fuskarsa murtuk idonsa yayi ja, Asabe ta koma bayana tana soshe soshen dukan da ta riga ta karba kafin in zo. Na nuna shi da dan yatsa na nace "duk hannunka daka saka a jikin ta bai ishe ka ba sai ka kuma sakawa da niyyar duka? To wallahi bar ganin Yasmin da Asad da suke tsakanin mu, idan ka kuma dora hannun ka a jikinta sai na hada ka da hisba"
Ya bini da kallo, mamaki fal a cikin idonsa sannan ya mayar da dubansa kan Asabe yace "ki bar gidan nan, kafin in shiga daki in fito"
Ya juya ya fita, na zare hannun Asabe daga jikina ba tare dana kalli fuskarta ba na fita. Haka kawai ganin su a tare a dakin sai naji kwakwalwa ta tana painting scenes iri iri, irin wadanda zuciya ta ba zata iya dauka ba. Na fita da sauri ina rufe bakina. Anan ne abin ya kasance ko a dakinsa? Kan gadon da muke kwanciya ni da shi? Kukan da nayi rantsuwa na daina shine ya taso min, nayi saurin shiga daki har da turo kofa amma ina juyawa da niyyar yin kuka na sai naga Yasmin a tsaye a gaban kayan da bake hadawa. Asad tsaye a gefenta suna kallona.
"Mommy ina zamu je" Asad ya tambaya
"Mommy what's going on? Are you crying?" Yasmin ta tambaya
"Ko Daddy ne ya dake ki? Naji kukan Asabe Daddy yana dukan ta" Asad ya sake tambaya
"Mommy fada kuka yi da Daddy ko? Irin wanda kuka yi ranar nan ko? Ba kunyi min alkawarin kun daina fada ba?" Yasmin ta sake tambaya.
Na hadiye kukana, na share hawayen da already ya fara gangarowa zuwa kuncina sannan na kirkiri murmushi.
That's one of the hardest things dana taba yi a rayuwata but for my children I can do more than that. Na durkusa a gaban su ina rarraba ido a tsakanin su. Zaman da nake yi a gidan nan after all that has been happening saboda su ne, and yanzun ma tafiyar da zamuyi saboda su ne. Na shafa fuskokin su a tare nace "tafiya zamuyi, zamuje gidan Umma" Asad yayi tsalle "su Muhsin (dan yaya Hudallah, sa'an Asad) zasu je suma? Mommy zan iya tafiya da game dina muyi tare da su ko?" Na gyada masa kai, bai jira sauran amsa ta ba ya yi hanyar waje da sauri yana cewa "bara inje in harhada kayan wasa na" ya juyo yana nuna ni "mommy kar fa ku tafi ku barni, yanzu zan dawo".
Bayan ya fita na dawo da kallona kan Yasmin, har yanzu da kirkirar ren murmushi a fuskata. Amma kallon da take min ne ya saka murmushin ya gudu ya barni. "Whats going on?" Ta sake tambaya ta. Bance mata komai ba saboda bansan me zance mata ba. Mamakin ta kawai nake yi, kamar kullum she is acting matured, tamkar kwakwalwar ta tafi shekarun ta girma. "Gidan Abba zamuje, na sake fada mata, we are going to be living there for a while" "Daddy kuma fa?" Ta tambaya. Na mike tsaye ina cigaba da hada kayan mu. "Mommy daddy kuma fa? Bin mu zaiyi ko shi kadai zamu bari a gida?"
Na juyo a fusace tare da nuna ta da yatsa "shut your mouth. Mai shegen iyayi. In kika sake min wata tambayar sai na fasa bakin ki" ta tabe baki sannan ta samu bakin gado ta zauna tare da folding hannayenta tana bina da kallo har na gama abinda nake na fito musu da kayan sanyi na mika mata "ki saka sweater da hula da socks, sai ki kira Asad ya saka nasa" ta karba tana cewa "mommy yanzu zamu tafi? Ba zamu bari sai gobe ba? Magrib ta kusa fa" na watsa mata harara sannan na jawo ta na fara saka mata da kaina. She is right, magrib ta kusa sanyi kuma ya fara kadawa. Gari ya fara duhu, but am not going to spend another night breathing the same air with Umar. I rather take my chances with the cold.
Shigowar sa ta saka muka dago a tare muka kalle shi. Yasmin tayi saurin matsawa daga kusa da ni ta tafi gurinsa "Daddy wai gidan Abba zamuje inji mommy. Daddy ni bana son zuwa bana son tafiya in barka ni nafi son zama a gurinka" ta karasa tana matsar hawaye. She has always been daddy's girl tun tana baby. Ya durkusa a gaban ta. "Babu inda zaki je kinji baby girl? Kina tare da daddyn ki. Now go and watch TV a falo zanyi magana da mommy" ta juya ta kalle ni sannan ta fita da sauri, I noticed tayi relaxing, maganar sa ta kwantar mata da hankali.
Sai data rufe kofa sannan ya juyo kaina inda nake kokarin rufe windows "Jidda, please don't do this. In ba kya son ganina I can leave the house for you har sai kin sauko zuciyarki tayi sanyi sai in dawo. Please ba dan ni ba ko dan yaran nan kar ki raba musu hankalin su dan Allah. Kar kije ki tayar da hankalin su Abba a kan maganar da bata taka kara ta karya ba. Karya ce yarinyar nan tayi miki, I told you koma me tace nayi karya take banyi ba, I don't know me yasa zaki dauki maganar ta ki bar tawa ni a matsayina na mijinki. I don't....."
Na daga masa hannu "ya ishe ka haka. Ganin ka ma a gabana bata min rai yake yi ballantana sauraron muryarka. Please ni ba fahimtar ma me kake cewa nake yi ba dan yanxu am beyond reasoning. Go away please, kaje dakinka ko kitchen ko dakin Asabe..... anywhere but inda bazan ganka ba har in gama abinda zan yi in fita. Then you are free to do koma menene zakayi. You are free ka kawo mata har cikin gidan ka ma ba zan cigaba da zama shamaki a gare ka ba. Do whatever you want, I don't care. Am done caring"
Yanayin fuskarsa zai iya saka mai saurin kuka ya fashe da kuka ba tare da yaji karin bayani ba. The same look da yake using a duk lokacin da nayi mishi irin wannan kamun. "Jidda please, give me one more chance. One more chance. In na kuma wasa da wannan damar na yarda kiyi min komai ma. One last chance please......"
Nayi dan gajeren murmushi. "Last chances dinka guda nawa ne a duniya Faruq?........am done" na zuge jakar kayan na fara kokarin dauka. Ya rike hannuna biyu na nasa guda biyu, "Dan Allah dan Allah fa nace Jidda. Ni fa mijinki ne kuma nace miki ki duba Allah kiyi hakuri. Ki bani dama inyi miki bayani Jidda, wallahi banyi abinda kike tunani ba, wallahi karya take yi, darajar yayan da suke tsakanin mu. In ci darajar su please ko ban ci darajar soyayya ba, ko ban ci darajar son da nake miki ba. Kin sani Jidda, kin san ba zan iya rayuwa babu ke ba Jidda, in kika bar no bansan yadda zanyi ba, ban san me zan zama ba, kar ki yanke min hukuncin kisa ba tare da kinji nawa side of the story din ba"
Sai ya cika hannuna daya ya kamo bayan wuyana da hannunsa, hannun da naji ya dauki zafi kamar gasashshen naman da aka sauke shi daga wuta yanzu. Na tabbatar da za'a auna temperature dinsa a asibiti to kuwa tabbas za'a bashi gado, kamar yadda da za'a auna bp dina nima za'a bani gado, sannan ya dora bakinsa da sauri akan nawa ya na kissing dina as heated as yadda jikinsa ya dauki zafi.
Da farko kiss dinsa ya shige ni, as usual, kamar yadda kalaman sa suka fara shigata as usual. But sai ƙwaƙwalwa ta ta aiyano min bakin Asabe, musamman farkon zuwanta gidan lokacin da har sai dana hanata magana a kusa dani saboda warin da bakinta yake yi. Sai dana takura mata da yin brush sau biyu a rana sannan muka samu sa'ida, sannan bakin ta ya fara zama irin na mutane.
Wani amai naji ya taho min mai zafi, na fara kokarin ture shi amma yaki shikani, yunkurin aman da nayi ne ya saka yayi saurin saki na, Allah ya taimake shi, badan haka ba da tabbas na juye masa taliyar da naci da rana a cikin bakinsa, na shiga toilet da sauri na juye ta a can. Na wanke bakina da fuskata ina kokarin kawar da hoton bakin Asabe daga zuciyata, in ba haka ba aman ba zai tsaya ba saboda ni mutun ce mai tsananin tsantsani. I wonder yadda na iya zama da Faruq har tsahon shekara shida. Lallai ba karamin so nake yi masa ba. But not anymore.
Na fito da face towel a hannuna ina goge fuskata da hannayena, yana tsaye a inda na barshi kamar mutum mutumi fuskar sa cike da mamaki yace "did you just......." Na karasa masa "vomit, because you kissed me. Yes. And that ought to assure you that it really is over between us" na dauki hijabi na na saka, na rataya handbag dina sannan na kinkimi jakar kayan yarana na kuma ja hannun akwatin kayana nazo na wuce shi na fita.
A falo naga Yasmin a zaune a kan kujera ta zubawa kofar dakin da muke ciki ido, hawaye a fuskar ta wasu suna bin bayan wasu. Ina fitowa ta mike tsaye sannan ta kalli kayan da na fito dasu tace "mommy fada kuke da Daddy ko?" Ban bata amsa ba. Asad ya fito daga dakin da yake matsayin nasu duk da dai ba zama suke yi a ciki ba sai dai in zasu yi wasa , hannayensa cike da tarkacen kayan wasan sa fuskarsa cike da annashuwa, na karbi kayan na zuzzuba a aljihun jakar kayansu shi kuma ya zuba wasu a pockets dinsa. Na saka masa sweater da socks na hannu dana kafa, sannan na saka masa hula na rufe masa har kunnuwan sa. "Oya muje"
Ina kallon Yasmin tana kallon kofar dakina, kuma jikina ya bani yana tsaye a gurin amma ban waiga ba kuma bani da niyyar waigawa. Naji tace "Daddy!" Sai naji muryarsa yace "go, Yasmin, go with your mother, zan zo anjima da daddare in taho daku gabakidaya" naji kamar in juya in gaya masa magana amma na daure saboda idon yara. Bama taba musayar magana a gaban yara.
Na tisa keyar yarana har waje, a lokacin ne na lura kofar dakin Asabe a bude kuma bata ciki, ko a jikina ban damu ba, ban dau da inda ta tafi ba ko kuma abinda zai faru da ita ba, alhakin ta yana yuwan wadda ta kawo ta gidan.
Muna fita compound automatically muka tafi inda mota ta take fake kusa da tasa, sai kuma zuciyata ta ayyana min wani abu, shi ya sayi motar, in dai har zan rabu dashi ya kamata in fara koyan rayuwa ba tare da shi ba. Sai na juya nayi hanyar gate, ina jin Yasmin tana jero min tambaya, Asad yace "mommy a motar haya zamu tafi?" Nace masa "eh" yayi tsalle "cool! This is amazing!"
Na jiyo takunsa da sauri ya biyo bayanmu. "Jidda Jidda Jidda. Jidda please don't punish these kids. Kar ki fita dasu a cikin sanyin nan, ina zaku samu mota yanzu a nan? Dan Allah ki shiga motar ki, ni ki bani inyi driving din in driving din ne ba kya son yi. Dan Allah" na watsa masa wani mugun kallo ina kankance idona a kansa, maganganu da dama suna forming a zuciyata amma ina danne su saboda yara, kamar yadda nake komai saboda yara.
Yayi kokarin rike hannu na not minding kallon da nayi masa "kin san baki da lafiyar numfashi Jidda, idan ciwonki ya tashi a hanya me kike tunanin zai faru? Ya kike so inyi da raina?"
Nayi gaba na barshi ina hada hannun akwati da hannun Yasmin ina ja a tare. Sai ya sunkuya ya dauki Asad ya dora shi a kafadar sa yana gyara masa hularsa, sannan ya
